April 26, 2010

Crashing Immunity, Money Trouble, and a Blue Sky Saturday

I am sick. Again. This is frustrating to me because I spent most of March hacking up my lungs and drinking hot tea with honey. In the span of one week I went from having a minor cough and cold to having bronchitis to a hairy sinus infection. My ears were plugged for about two and a half weeks straight and I was forced to take antibiotics that left me with a full body rash and many, many sleepless nights. Note to self: do not take Sulfa drugs, YOU ARE ALLERGIC.

Now, not even a month after having recovered, I am sick yet again. I’m not sure with what this time. My lymph nodes have been swollen and sore for about a week. My throat hurts, yesterday I started losing my voice. I’ve been suffering through an irritating cough. Last night I went to bed around 10 and woke up twice, once around 12:30 and again at 6 am, unable to breath because my nose was completely congested and my throat was burning dry. Needless to say, I didn’t go back to bed after that. Fortunately, I have an early class this morning so getting up early isn’t so completely pointless.

Fortunately, my beautiful, gorgeous, totally amazing mother offered to get me an appointment with her doctor next week for a full physical. I called her last night, near to tears, because I’d had the longest day of my life and was incredibly stressed. Among other current financial burdens, I found out yesterday that I’m due to pay a $400 fine for a speeding ticket. This, of course, has me stressed because I can think of a million other important things that I could do with $400. Buy my return plane ticket from Montana. Send a couple of boxes off to Germany. Buy presents for the multitude of children I am leaving behind in Monterey. Put gas in my car and take a trip to visit my family next week. Pay to have the carpets cleaned in our apartment. Car payments, State Farm, credit card payments, dental bills, blah, blah, blah. I broke down on the phone last night and my mother, bless her soul, did everything she could to calm my crying, to make me feel like my trip to Germany isn’t going to leave me penniless and broke. Although her encouraging words are of the kindest variety and they did help a little bit, have I mentioned that after next weekend I don’t have a steady income and have to live for a month and a half, vacation, and journey to Europe relying solely on $1k savings, sporadic babysitting funds, may-or-may-not-sell-my-stuff-on-craigslist, a 600-something-dollar apartment deposit, and maybe-graduation money. Plus I have a bunch of other crap to worry about. Credit card bills, medical bills, traffic violations, etc, etc. I know it’s my own fault for never saving the money that I make and having horrible spending habits so, really, I am my own worst enemy in this case but I am stressed out.

I’m going to try to relax today as it is my first day being semi-jobless. I lost my nanny job with the baby to a daycare center so I am sans-baby for the rest of my time here in Monterey. For the remainder of the week I’ve picked up random work shifts. One at the children’s museum where I work (until next Sunday), two at the candle store where I worked for 2 years but haven’t worked at since last summer, and two or three nights of babysitting. So this week, I won’t really have time to worry because I will be making money. But after that… who knows! 

Today I plan to go to my 8:30 class, do some research in the library for a project on adolescents, maybe polish off a little extra stuff for my Capstone, possibly go see a movie by myself (it’s that kind of a day), and then return home to clean my room, organize, and possibly do some packing.

However, despite my frustration and anxiety, I did have a really good weekend. I went to my friend’s bridal shower at her parent’s ranch out near Yosemite and had an incredible time just bonding with my girl friends and celebrating one of my best friend’s new marriage. The weather was gorgeous, we had sun and blue skies, and I even attempted to ride a horse. The fact that I was up at 6 am yesterday, drove 3 hours, and worked until 8 pm, was definitely worth it in the long run. I wish that I could have more moments like that with my friends over the next few weeks but I feel as if Germany is just coming on too quickly and isn’t leaving a lot of space for this kind of stuff. So I cherish this past weekend, it means a lot to me to have those moments with my friends.

Until next time. <3


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