This past weekend I went for a second round at Fruhlingsfest and I had so much fun. Beer festivals are one of the things that I will miss the most about Munich. And there are a lot of things that I will miss but beer festivals are definitely up there at the top of the list. I like it much better than Oktoberfest because there are less people and more available tables, faster service, etc etc. We had a table right up front, center stage to the band that played all night long. We danced and sang along and had a merry time, right up until they closed and kicked us all out. And I practiced great self control. It was my pay day and I only bought two beers. Instead of five like I did the previous weekend. After the festival, a few of us braved the rain and decided to go clubbing. We ended up at Cord, a club that plays some great indie music and even though I paid 6 EUR for the cover, I only stayed about an hour or so before I left to catch the last train home. I was ridiculously tired from all of the dancing that I had been doing that day. I made it home by 2:30, soaking wet and cold, took a long, late night bath, and then went to bed close to 4 am. The night before that, I'd stayed up until about the same time, drunk off of Friday the 13th festivities and two or so bottles of wine. Last night, on Sunday, I stayed out with friends at a shisha bar until 2 a.m. I definitely need to make this week one of early nights and catch up a bit. I'm starting to feel ill from only sleeping 4 to 5 hours every night. Personal challenge accepted! Unless I have plans (aka Shamrock's karaoke) I will be in bed at 10:30 and lights out by 11 most nights this week. Haha. We'll see how well this goes!
Happy German girl at the festival!
Yesterday (the 15th) was the one-month mark to the end of my au pair contract. On June 15th, I am officially done being an au pair and I will be set free for five final says in Munich, unemployed and with approximately 225 EUR in hand. My friends and I have planned an epic going away slash birthday party for a collective few of us and that happens two days before I board my plane back to California. It will be a great party and I'll probably have a few drunken cries through most of it. I don't have a lot of pocket money (thanks Rome!) for the remainder of my time here so I'm limited in what I can do for the rest of my time here but I'm hoping to go to Berlin in June to visit my friend Alison and then she'll come to Munich and visit me here. It'll be good to see her before I leave, too, since she's become my best friend from the days working as a camp counselor. I have a lot of things to organize, too, as far as packing is concerned. I want to get rid of a lot of it - so many of my clothes got ruined by the damn washer and dryer and the shitty hard water in Germany so I'm going to throw most of them away. It still feels like I'll never get it all home again. Ah! I can't believe I have to leave this place... it feels impossible. It reminds me of the quote from Eat, Pray, Love:
“The only thing more unthinkable than leaving was staying;
the only thing more impossible than staying was leaving.”
I want to go home – God, do I want that. I miss my mom and I want to meet the dog that she bought to fill the void in her heart after I left. I don’t want to live with this family anymore – or any family, for that matter. I want to spent five hours in Target. I want to take peoples of people in Wal-Mart. I want to buy crossaints and muffins and pizza at Costco. I want to go to all my favorite college bars with my friends from home. I want to lay on the beach for eight hour straight. I want to see my nephews and my sister, Christy. I want to visit my family in Montana. I want to sit down and tell my grandma all about my year abroad. I want to drive around in my car for hours and hours and turn the music up really loud and roll all the windows down. I want to get my hair cut and colored and get a manicure and pedicure and have my eyebrows waxed. I want to have a wallet full of American bills and I want to pay tax again and use my debit card everywhere I go. I want to be a California girl again.
But I want to be a German girl, too. I want to stay in Munich. I want everyone that I love in Munich to stay here too. I want to sit at a shisha bar for six hours and laugh and gossip and take pictures. I want to go to beer festivals every season and dance to music that I can’t understand but love anyway. I want to spend every sunny Saturday in the English Gardens drinking beer and catching a Frisbee and singing along to Florian’s ukulele. I want to sing karaoke at Shamrock’s every Tuesday night. I want to eat Bavarian food and have sausages and leberkase available to me on every corner. I want to buy Bayern tickets and take trains to random German towns all over Bavaria. I want to drink Augustiner every day. I want to be German forever.
I’m completely torn between the two places. In the end, I am going home, that is just the way that it is and I am okay with that. but I am going to miss Munich so much. Not only will I miss all of the wonderful friends that I’ve made here but I’m going to miss the city and the culture, the food, the memories that I had while I was living here. Hell, I might even miss the kids. Haha. It’s all coming to end so much faster than I would like. I am going to be so sad to leave here. It really does feel impossible.
But, the good news is that I have a job lined up at home that I am 98% decided upon. Between the eight families that have contacted me about working for them, only two of them have really done any follow through. I’ve been discussing offers and options, back and forth, between both of them and I think that I am decided on the one that I want. They’ve offered me the better package and the most information concerning schedules, salaries, benefits, expectations, etc, etc. Plus, the one that I want is more reasonable as far as finances are concerned and it gives me more room to rebuild my life and get back on my feet. Also, it would mean that I would be living with my mom in Morro Bay and that I wouldn’t be going back to Monterey. I’ve been thinking about living there and in the end it’s more practical for me to live with my mom for the next phase of my life and then I can work towards moving back to Monterey with better financial results. Anyway, the job is great and if I decide to take it, I’ll give more details about it but for now, we’ll just leave it in a state of indecision. I should know by the end of the week what choice I will make once they give me official offers or employment that I can either turn down or accept. I will let you know, dear readers!
Speaking of being a nanny (or something of the sort), I had a lot of fun with the girls this past Friday while I was babysitting. We went to a playground after they came home from school and we played in the sunshine and put flowers in our hair. I’ve been teaching myself how to braid so I invented this whole new hairstyle on the spot and the girls each ended up with a super cool head of hair. Au pair Hezzah for the win!